I think one of the signs a graduate student is on his or her way to graduating is when they start taking control of our meetings. With younger graduate students, I've found I have to set the agenda -- asking questions, pulling out information from them, and telling them things they need to do. Some time ago, I noticed that Adam was coming into our meetings with a written agenda. He asks me questions, gets information from me, and tells me what I need to do. And then, on a good day, we can collaborate on research.
I'm not saying that graduate students can walk in, day one, and take control like that. Indeed, most probably can't and shouldn't. But as a graduate student, the sooner you can take charge of your education and set your own agenda -- so your advisor is a resource, rather than your manager -- the better off you'll probably be.